Disclaimer: This post is a sponsored one. E Harmony contacted me and asked to write an article for my blog particularly targeting single mums. Given that I’m a mum, albeit not a single one (I live with my three kids but have a loving, committed partner living elsewhere – although soon we hope to rectify that), and the fact that I’ve watched the E Harmony ads and thought to myself that they’d be the mob I’d use if I was in the market for some relationship hunting, I said yes. So, here ’tis. Ad break music begin…
Single mums are some of the busiest people around. More often than not, they’re doing the work of two parents – helping kids with homework, taking them to after school activities, doing all the housework and grocery shopping plus usually working full or part-time. It’s a tough job, and sometimes it can be overwhelming. Here are some top tips on dating as a single mother.
Everyone deserves a second chance at love.
Chances are you’ve got a major broken relationship in your past. You have to move on and forget the problems of previous relationships; they won’t all be like that. However, it’s important to analyse what went wrong and how to avoid making the same mistakes again. If you learn to recognise and avoid them, it will help in a new relationship.
You deserve fun and happiness.
Being a mum really is hard work – especially if you’re doing it alone. You’ve definitely earned some time off for yourself. Enlist the help of family, friends and trusted babysitters to watch over the kids a few hours a week so you can spend time doing something specifically for you: whether that’s dating, a new hobby or class or going out with friends. Don’t feel like you have to be a slave to your kids or your job 24/7.
Get out there!
There are many ways to meet new people (click here to find out more). You could take a language course; or join a sports team or an amateur dramatic society. Online dating sites, like eharmony.com.au, are a particularly easy way to ease into dating. You can pick and choose according to things like lifestyle, time commitments, interests and goals.
Choose your moment to tell the kids.
Your kids might have difficulty accepting a new partner in your life and theirs. Let them know that you’re dating as it’s important to be honest, but hold off actually introducing anyone until you’ve met someone special, then ease them into life as part of your family. If it works out, they’ll have to get along with your kids too.
A lot of the time, mothers think of themselves as being in ‘mum mode’ or ‘work mode’, ‘friends mode’ or ‘family mode’ – this doesn’t leave much space to be in ‘dating mode or even ‘relationship mode’. However, it’s important to get the ‘me’ time that goes along with dating. The fun of dressing up and going out without the kids is important for your sense of self – and sanity!
(Editors note: I love the last comment…going out and being without kids – uhuh, sanity inducing for sure.)